Why I hate 24 Hour Catwalk
Alexa Chung: The challenge for the day is to make a ready-to-wear, avant-garde, winter swimsuit inspired by hot-air balloons made entirely out of dead horse skin and lightbulbs in one hour.
Designers: Lol, this is impossible
Alexa Chung: Time is up, let's deliberate on the designs
Alexa Chung: I like the design, I think it's brilliant given the circumstances.
Cynthia Rowley: There's only one thing wrong, but instead of just telling you what it is, I'm going to be a total cunt and overexaggerate it to prove my importance to the fashion world.
Derek Blasburg: I'm ugly so I can't just insult you personally like I want to. So I'm going to tell a corny second-rate joke that all of the judges can monotonously laugh at.
James Laforce: I just wish it could have been more wearable, more wearable, for the common woman, wearable, wearable.
Alexa Chung: Ok, we have to eliminate two of you, so we flipped a coin and Black Designer and Designer who looks like a hotter version of me..you may leave. Thank you.
Remaining Designers: This is the greatest accomplishment in my life.
Alexa Chung: Ok, now the real challenge has begun. You are now to create an entire collection of only 3 pieces in 24 hours. But, don't think it will be that easy, in the box in front of you is the manditory fabric that you must use in at least one of your designs. We have also given you sewers to help you. And the manditory fabric is....spinach pubic hair. Good luck, you 24 hours start now.
Designer 1: I'm going to be a little ambitious and incorporate the fabric in all 3 looks, because I'm really cool.
Designer 2: I'm going for a more Marylin Monroe, Gale with Green Gables resort wear collection with a twist of Equestrianism for an edge.
Sewers: Even though we are hired to simply sew, most of us have 'been in the industry' for 13 years plus, so we're going to put all of our opinions out there to add more 'drama' to the show
Designers: Lol, I can't do this.
Alexa Chung: 2 minutes left.
Designers: Lol, The sewing machine's not even on.
Designers: Ok, i'm done.
Runway: *crappy designs shown down a runway in groups of three*
Judges: You both suck, but we only have 4 minutes left of air-time so Perky White Designer with dying cat wins, congrats you win nothing because no one is going to care about you after that and In reality people are only watching this because they got the times for Project Runway: Allstars mixed up, Lol.
Designer: I'm so happy, and I really see a future for myself in the Fashion world, yeah.
STORY OF MY LIFE
me: i wish a boy would like me
boy: i like you
me: no not you
that awkward moment when you're in a hopeless...
in my nina simone voice...
there’s a light… a certain kind of light… that’s never shone on me… i want my whole life to be… lived with you…x2 there’s a way… everybody say… do each and every little thing… but what good does it bring… if i ain’t got you…x2 you don’t what it’s like… baby, you don’t...